My Life, My Pace

Recently, I've been socializing a lot, even over the Internet. I've joined a community called Fresh Faces. It is suppose to be a website to discuss about each month's MYC!'s magazine cover model, but I met a guy there who keep bombarding sarcasm at me like we're meant to be arch nemesis. So we've been bombarding sarcasm at each other for almost a whole month and it's still ongoing.

Surprisingly, it made the whole discussion board more lively because the account members there are.. let's say, not outgoing enough. It used to be only that guy (he's called devilicd, but I call him D) 'haunting' the place but now I've joined too, and let's say I'm a self-proclaimed discussion board 'exorcist', lol XD . Hey D!! I ain't leaving anytime soon, so you better prepare your 1001 sarcasm guide.

To be honest, I wasn't as outgoing as I am now a few months back, but after the incident (read my blog entry entitled 'New Life, New Chapter'), I've found myself to be much bolder than before (don't think dirty Mart, if you're reading this). Anyhow, recently, I've been really desperate to find myself a partner to share my ups and downs with. Yea, I know, I know, being desperate only keep the girls away, but hey!! I'm already 20 man, and I've only been in 1 relationship and it wasn't my cup of tea because the girl practically played with my feelings (read my blog entry entitled 'Shattered Sky').

I'm a guy who's not into short-term relationship. I'm more into a long-term relationship, because what's the point of loving someone if you're just into short-term relationship? It's painful to be played out by someone who you poured your entire heart into. Anyhow, I'm gonna stop here, don't wanna sound anymore desperate.

To be honest, this will be one of my most embarrassing topic. Well, my story is as follows. For the past few weekends I've been hanging out with my friends going here and there for drinks, movie, and shopping. And since we're a bunch of guys, our eyes are um.. let's say, are sensitive towards girls, especially pretty/cute chiqs (even if it's someone else's girlfriend).

The more I see, talk, think about this things, the more sad, lonely, and angry I felt. Mart once told me to be confident and go and pick up girls and it's not about shyness, because it'll either be a failure or success. If I try, I'll have a chance that it'll be successful, but I don't try, the chance will not exist at all. Sigh.. guess I need to learn to be more confident..

Well, the title couldn't get anymore direct than this.
I felt as though I've disappointed my best buddy.
As I'm working for an advertising agency, my friend has asked me whether am I interested in handling his soon-to-online company website.
He said that he offered the job to me since I'm his friend and he knows me well.
I was interested but it's a pity that my company has just recently ventured into web development.
We do not have enough specialist for this job, because it's just me alone.
Therefore, when I told my friend that I couldn't help him, I felt really bad because I thought I could quote him a cheaper price compare to the market price.

Sorry Mart!! Anyhow if I do get new jobs in which requires premiums, I'll contact you first hand. Cheers!!

For the past few days it was all fun for me. I've been meeting up with my best friend for tea again and went out for movies a few times. After that I began to feel guilty. It's not that I've done something wrong but the fact that my aunt and grandfather has taken me in after I've ran away from home, I barely spent time with my grandfather. Although I've spent most of my time drinking with my aunt and her friends (even more than I spent with my friends), I feel that I've spent little time with my grandfather.

Therefore, the whole of the raya weekend, I've spent my time with my grandfather at home playing mahjong to entertain him (no idea how to play, just throw n take whatever tiles I get my hands on =P), of course, my aunt was there as we needed 3 players =P. Yesterday I've promised my friend that I'll meet them for tea in the evening, but I had to turn them down because I wanted to spend more time with my grandfather. I'm sorry that I could not come guys!! Well, guess we sometimes have to compromise. We can't get the best of both worlds, right??